Last night the ladies from my church group, known as the Relief Society, gathered for an activity. My new volunteer assignment is to help lead this group in our mission of compassion, service and enrichment for the women over 18 in our area. I love it! I love working with the women of our ward. I love working with our Relief Society presidency! I love the opportunity I have to plan activities with our committee, and the chance to be used as a vessel for God’s work. This is so not about me. This is all about Him.
Our theme for the year is, “Prepared in a manner that had never been known.”
In the Book of Mormon Captain Moroni knew of a wicked enemy, the Lamanites were rallying against the Nephites. Rather than wait to be taken down, their leader helped fortify, strengthen and prepare his people against the oncoming rival. In Alma we read, “Now the leaders of the Lamanites had supposed, because of the greatness of their numbers, yea, they supposed that they should be privileged to come upon them as they had hitherto done; yea, and they had also prepared themselves with shields, and with breastplates; and they had also prepared themselves with garments of skins, yea, very thick garments to cover their nakedness. And being thus prepared they supposed that they should easily overpower and subject their brethren to the yoke of bondage, or slay and massacre them according to their pleasure. But behold, to their uttermost astonishment, they were prepared for them, in a manner which never had been known among the children of Lehi. Now they were prepared for the Lamanites, to battle after the manner of the instructions of Moroni.” (Alma 49:7-8)
In our day the enemies are different, but no less devastating, abundant or real. Pornography, entitlements, addiction, debt, and fear all run rampant, destroying individuals and the families who love them. And so we need to step up and be more prepared against our enemy, to fortify our faith, homes, our families and friendships in the bonds of love and connection.
One of the ways we desire to prepare the Relief Society sisters is to fortify our friendships, and make our space of worship and friendship a safe place to confide, to strengthen and to encourage.
Vulnerability does not have to happen to all in a big group, but if each woman has a connection to at least one person, in her time of need the Relief Society can do what it was designed to do, enrich, support and buoy up the downtrodden.
Last night we hosted an early spring tea party. Tea as in lemon water, and crumpets, as in tiny sandwiches and finger food. In small groups we asked the following questions:
- What is the most courageous thing you have done?
- What is your biggest fear?
- What is your most embarrassing moment?
- What is your favorite scripture or scripture story?
- What is your favorite hymn and why?
- If you could give your younger self advise, what would it be?
- What advise would you give to someone you love about getting along with others.
I have chills from my head to my toes. The spirit was so strong last night. Walls came down, friendships were born, and sisters shared in the light and truth of real life experiences. In our midst we had among us those who have; buried a grown child, started a fresh in a new state as a single mom raising three kids, left an abusive relationship, been left infertile and heartbroken. We have an Olympic ceremony performer, Angel Landing hiker, and a mom who pushed through dramatic and death-difying labor and delivery to bring her child to this world. We are not perfect women, hiding in the guise of ease. We are women who have lived through the world’s fallen nature, and found the faith to persevere despite heartbreak, heartache and despair. We are not individuals seeking to rise above others, we are a group climbing to God in faith. We shared tears, and we shared faith.
As I climbed into bed last night, I felt light inside my whole body. That may sound strange, but every part of my being felt vibrant and whole. I am so grateful for these amazing sisters that I call my friends. And I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who teaches us to live through the entire spectrum of experience; struggle, pain, persistence, joy and light.
So here it goes….
- What is the most courageous thing you have done?
When I was in Junior High I auditioned for a Shakespearean acting company. I was terrified, but that decision changed the direction of my life. So grateful to have spent 6 years under the tutelage of Frank and Jill Gerrish learning to present, to feel and to be willing to be vulnerable where people could see me. Second thing, giving birth naturally to my fourth child, who came too quick for meds. That was hands down the hardest thing I have ever done, but I am so grateful for my body, and how intuitive God made us. - What is your biggest fear?
I hate hate snakes. But worse than that is the fear of water on my face. I had a swimming instructor as a kid who kept my face in the water unless I turned sideways instead of up. I thought I was going to drown. Yuck. - What is your most embarrassing moment?
Of said Shakespearean acting group. I had a small crush on an older actor. At a class party my acting coach and friend Jill arranged for this actor to come down the stair with a leather jacket over his bare chest, just to tease me. SOOOO embarrassing. Thanks Jill! 😉 - What is your favorite scripture or scripture story?
Alma 37:37 “Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day.” As my grandpa lay dying, we gathered as a family. My brother Solomon asked Grandma what his favorite scripture was, and we read this. He was literally lying down unto the Lord, after living a valiant and faithful life. He turned his life to God, and worked hard. His efforts changed the world literally, and changed me. I am so grateful for him. - What is your favorite hymn and why?
“Nearer My God To Thee” – When I studied abroad in Israel we went to Bethel, the place were Jacob laid his head on a pillow of stone, and dreamed of angels ascending and descending a latter unto heaven. We sang this song about this experience, and my whole being filled with the spirit. The landscape was barren, rocky and hot. And yet I could feel the spirit of concourses of angels attending that sacred ground. The other thing about this song is the heartfelt prayer to come closer to God by simple acts.
“Come Thou Fount” – I love the phrase, ” Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, prone to leave the God I love; here’s my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above.” This so perfectly describes me. I have such a strong desire to serve and to come unto God, but am plagued with my own humanity. Even thou I wander, and make mistakes his love for me is perfect, and he has provided a way that I am sealed to him. - If you could give your younger self advise, what would it be?
Don’t be afraid to grieve, to express frustration and to share what’s really in your heart. For years I have squelched my grief, it was inappropriate in my family to express negativity, not all a bad quality to be optimistic, but I didn’t learn how to express my negative emotions. Several years ago I finally let go of the need to hide some long seeded grief. I cried a lot for about two years. I came to terms with some hard stuff, allowed forgiveness to wash over me, and now I feel lighter and happier than I ever have. So grateful!! To feel joy, we really need to allow ourselves to feel the emotions of what comes our way, and lovingly and gently let them go. - What advise would you give to someone you love about getting along with others?
Be nicer than necessary. Be honest with your feelings. Give others the benefit of the doubt.
