A new chapter is coming

I went to a baptism today for a cousin of Anna’s.  Hailey Vick is a second cousin. She has blonde hair, hopeful blue eyes and a newly adult-tooth smile. Her delicate and beautiful white dress reverently donned her small frame. She stood tall next to her bishop as he introduced her, a daughter of Jason and Holly, and shared her favorite scripture hero and her goals to be more Christlike by being kind to everyone. The spirit witnessed to me, while I corralled and convinced my children to be more Christlike, that they too would soon be taking upon themselves the name of Christ. Are they ready? Will they accept the offer to come unto Jesus? Will they pause from their days activities to remember to pray, remember to thank the Lord for all his goodness? Will they feel gratitude for their blessings… the small things like being able to breath and to walk and to love.  Will they look to others as angels sent from God to help them on their path? Will they forgive those that hurt them? Will they feel the cleansing power of the Atonement? Will they feel when they cannot physically accomplish a goal, do they turn to God and plead for strength? Do they know that things they cannot accomplish on their own are possible with God’s strength? Will they remember that I love them? When I am gone, will my memory honor the God that I love so?

The light in my children’s eyes when they see me come home from a day’s work, the smile from my baby when I feed her empty tummy. The warmth I feel from my husband, next to me as I lay in bed at night. The sunshine that I can see, and feel and taste. The food the fills my refrigerator, the clothes that I wash in my fancy washing machine. The forgiveness I have felt to those whose choices have hurt me. The love I feel for my ancestors and the desire I have to do good. The opportunity to have a new client, they said yes! The experience and tutoring from God to create and experience goodness for my family. The Lord in his mighty power, has been an mediator to me, standing between the Heavenly Father whom I love and am unworthy to see, and myself, the dust of the earth. How I love Jesus. What is impossible for me, is mighty and wonderful to him. What is hopeless for me, through him is joy. I am so grateful for my imperfection. It reminds me to whom I look for hope. It reminds me that my feeble efforts, though they may be every ounce of hope that I contain, are nothing compared to the greatness and vastness of God. All he wants is all that I can give. Then He, in is infinite goodness calls my name,”Sarah! I am here. I want you to need me. When you do, I’ll be waiting here, for you to ask for my help.” “Sarah! Things are as they should be.” “Sarah, listen.” “Sarah, love him” “Sarah, be still and know that I am God.”

These are the whisperings I hear. All he wants is all I can give, no more, no less. And when I give it my all, when my reservoirs are empty I collapse. And once again, the windows of heaven are opened and I receive his love, his strength and his mercy. And more importantly, I feel and experience joy.

While Hailey stood in the baptismal font next to her dad, she radiated goodness. A small child, dressed in purity, clothed in the power of the priesthood. Her father, Jason stood firmly and gently holding her hands, raised his hands to the square and majestically commanded the power of God to cleanse his sweet daughter. As he opened his mouth to speak, emotions took over every preparation of the day. And he paused, as he tried to choke back tears. A new door is opening for Hailey, one of responsibility and stewardship. Soon, too my own children will walk through that door.

Brennan said to me today,”Mom! I can’t wait to get baptized!” And Anna told me on our way out, “Mom? Do you have to get baptized when you go to church? I’m just asking,” she said. “I’m going to get baptized, I just wanted to know.”

The choice of baptism is yours my child.
The choice is yours.
The desire to live, to honor God and to always remember him is yours.
I can plant love in your heart, belief in your mind.
I can nourish your body and clean your clothes,
but the choice to love God is your own.

My child, I love you and want you to live.
Not only here and now, but in eternity by my side.
If only for a moment, I could help you understand,
that God’s greatest blessings are always given by covenant.
When we experience separation from those blessings, it is not because he has disappeared.
It is because we have moved from his protection.

What he asks us is to always remember him
and in return, he gives us the Holy Spirit to always be with us.
If I could always remember HIM, remember that he is by my side, that he does walk the halls of the Holy Temple, that he lives for the penitent heart, that he breaths for those that are breathless.

Author: Sarah Johnson

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