Spencer W. Kimball said, “In his wisdom and mercy, our Father made men and women dependent on each other for the full flowering of their potential. Because their natures are somewhat different, they can complement each other; because they are in many ways alike, they can understand each other. Let neither envy the other for their differences; let both discern what is superficial and what is beautifully basic in those differences, and act accordingly” (“Relief Society—Its Promise and Potential,” Ensign, Mar. 1976, 5).
- What are the fundamental purposes of having men and women?
- Why are we so different?
- What are we supposed to learn from each other and how can we serve one another?
- Can we successfully eliminate one gender to fulfill our own needs?
- What can we learn about cultural expectations and societal norms that do not reflect church doctrine or influence?
- How can we transform our households and our society into a place where church doctrine is sustained and cultural needs are being met for both genders?
Men are strong.
Men are instinctively competitive and quite often will stand up confidently for their own self worth, perceptions and responsibilities. Men have an innate desire to build and to accomplish. For the modern man this fulfillment can come from scholarly, professional or hobby interests. Men have a strong desire to be heard and to be validated. Men desire to protect, this includes loved ones, land, possessions and freedom. The heart of men, which pricked with love, is fiercely loyal. Often men protect their sensitive souls with a layer of hard work and onward movement. But this is not an indication of an inability to show or feel love, the opposite is true. Their affection can be seen with a never resting work ethic, a desire to improve one’s station by improving one’s mind and craft, and a seeking to fix the broken and abandoned projects of life, both physical and emotional. When connecting to a man’s softest heart, expect to feel totally flooded and encompassed with a deep an abiding attention. Men do not express their emotions a little, or with reserve. They unabashedly throw themselves in the path of their fondest, in hopes to receive a return of admiration. Men create the movement of society through ideas, inventions and organizations.
Women are soft, compassionate, nurturing and smart.
Woman have a god given ability to openly love, and to encourage growth. Women connect to others, including and especially to other women. Women receive from others and strive to improve their station through beauty, art, and order. Women hold sacred the hearth of creation. Within their breast comes the wellspring of life. The heart of women are more open to give love freely, and so are more vulnerable to heartache and pain. Women hold high their opportunity of leadership. Their influence is felt through words of encouragement, exploration of new ideas and a bolstering of confidence. Women bear the burden of balming rejection and failure with soothing words of hope and renewed faith. Women smile with their hearts and can share their devotion through words, music, order and sustenance. The ties forged in adversity can remain in tact throughout their entire lifetime. Women often face tragedy alone and require great inner strength to move forward, despite heartache, poor health or loneliness. Women call upon angels, seen and unseen, for strength and resolve to do with grace and patience that which requires a fierce and competitive drive.
In his talk, “For Time and All Eternity,” from General Conference in 1993, President Packer shares the parable of the treasure and the keys.
“Once a man received as his inheritance two keys. The first key, he was told, would open a vault which he must protect at all cost. The second key was to a safe within the vault which contained a priceless treasure. He was to open this safe and freely use the precious things which were stored therein. He was warned that many would seek to rob him of his inheritance. He was promised that if he used the treasure worthily, it would be replenished and never be diminished, not in all eternity. He would be tested. If he used it to benefit others, his own blessings and joy would increase.
The man went alone to the vault. His first key opened the door. He tried to unlock the treasure with the other key, but he could not, for there were two locks on the safe. His key alone would not open it. No matter how he tried, he could not open it. He was puzzled. He had been given the keys. He knew the treasure was rightfully his. He had obeyed instructions, but he could not open the safe.
In due time there came a woman into the vault. She too held a key. It was noticeably different from the key he held. Her key fit the other lock. It humbled him to learn that he could not obtain his rightful inheritance without her.They made a covenant that together they would open the treasure and, as instructed, he would watch over the vault and protect it; she would watch over the treasure. She was not concerned that, as guardian of the vault, he held two keys, for his full purpose was to see that she was safe as she watched over that which was most precious to them both. Together they opened the safe and partook of their inheritance. They rejoiced, for, as promised, it replenished itself.
With great joy they found that they could pass the treasure on to their children; each could receive a full measure, undiminished to the last generation.
Perhaps some few of their posterity would not find a companion who possessed the complementary key, or one worthy and willing to keep the covenants relating to the treasure. Nevertheless, if they kept the commandments, they would not be denied even the smallest blessing.
Because some tempted them to misuse their treasure, they were careful to teach their children about keys and covenants.
There came, in due time, among their posterity some few who were deceived or jealous or selfish because one was given two keys and another only one. “Why,” the selfish ones reasoned, “cannot the treasure be mine alone to use as I desire?”
Some tried to reshape the key they had been given to resemble the other key. Perhaps, they thought, it would then fit both locks. And so it was that the safe was closed to them. Their reshaped keys were useless, and their inheritance was lost.
Those who received the treasure with gratitude and obeyed the laws concerning it knew joy without bounds through time and all eternity.”
As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I realize that the unique characteristics and opportunities I am given as a women are divinely appointed. In my own womb I have conceived and borne four precious souls. Together with my husband, our station and responsibility in life is to rear and raise these children unto the Lord. In the face of tragedy, which so often besets the modern family, I could do it alone. However, time and time again it is proven that a family of without a mother, or a father, is at a disadvantage. Statistics, black and white on a spreadsheet shout with loud declaration that it is down right impossible to give to children with one parent what they could receive with two.
A father’s duty is to protect the mother of his children, so that she can safely nurture their children. “She was not concerned that, as guardian of the vault, he held two keys, for his full purpose was to see that she was safe as she watched over that which was most precious to them both.”
The keys that President Packer are referring to include the keys of the priesthood and the keys of procreation.
Many women stand at the foot of the Prophet and loudly demand to be given the keys of the priesthood. Ordain Women is a movement inspired by a few women to encourage unrest regarding the unique roles and responsibilities given to each gender, they are insisting to be given the priesthood. Now excommunicated leader Kate Kelly stands as a witness to God’s irrevocable laws. Heavenly Father’s divine plan for mortal families does not include women bearing the priesthood. Our responsibilities include the primary nurturing and upbringing our our children, as an equal partner to our husband.
If an important assignment were to be given, the most important assignment, wouldn’t it be considered an honor to the one receiving that assignment, if all others were taken away, knowing that a full investment and focus was to be given to that one job? Motherhood is essential in order to raise a righteous posterity. It is impossible to expect a generation of new faithful saints to arise, unless a devoted and tender mother can nurture, watch over and care for her offspring.
I imagine Father in Heaven teaching,
“I need a woman, who is soft on the inside and the outside, who will forego sleep, comforts, material possessions, and earthly accolades so that she may build faith, courage, integrity and virtue. I need a woman who recognizes that her greatest earthly treasure is not the cash in her bank account, but the testimony of her children, fortified through daily, consistent love, counsel, admonition and praise. I need a woman who fights off the temptations of man, who will build the kingdom of God through faith, repentance and consistent, quiet worship. I need a woman whose soft heart is open to the almost indiscernible whisperings of the Holy Ghost. She is on an errand of angels, to lift, to comfort, to direct and to inspire.”
“In order for humanity’s greatest mission to be accomplished I need strong, upstanding men to provide protection and support for the women of the kingdom. Alone she would be left vulnerable. Together, you will rear unto God righteous stewards of his kingdom. Alone, you would both fail. As men, you need to fully cloth yourself in the Armor of God. You need physical strength, emotional stamina, outwitting smarts and a tenacity for growth. Your ultimate goal is to protect the fold. You will be required to serve long hours. You will face great adversity and struggle as you provide bread and sustenance for your family. You will use the priesthood of God to act for me during times of sickness, doubt and challenges. The organization of my church will be administered through this priesthood. All of your doings should be in the name of Jesus Christ, as a steward of his work, you will be required to showcase efforts of faith, charity, kindness, and faith.”
