In my front yard is a row of trees, three to be exact. I love these trees! In the spring they produce the most glorious pink blossoms! As they fall to the ground at the onslaught of summer, the gently wafting pedals look like a pastel snowstorm, blanketing my newly emerging grass with a layer of spring.
Last year the middle of the three trees took began to decay. The life force of tree has cut off several large branches, which has in turn browned and frozen old, withered leaves. Through the summer months of abundance and life, several branches of crispy brown leaves stood upon their pedestal, quaking in stiffness with a gentle breeze.
Everyday as I would drive in to my circle the first thing I would notice was these dead branches, in the midst of my beautiful trees.
“I need to do something about that.”
Next day, “I wonder if our saw is strong enough to cut those out. I wonder if I am strong enough to use that thing.”
Day after that, “That’s ugly. I hope my tree isn’t dying.”
It is now December. Granted, there is no snow. It’s been a really warm winter, all of the leaves have fallen, and yet there is a small patch of leaves that hangs on – all scraggly and withered. They cling to the branch in perpetuity, disregarding the fact that in the circle-of-life-leaves are now supposed to be filling the earth with nitrogen via decomposition, or transforming into spring time mulch at the local dump.
How much is this like life? When part of my life falls away; an opportunity, a season, or a relationship, do let I it go? Like the natural cycle of my leaves? Or do I hang on with all the fortitude of a stiff and lifeless leaf? At moments when challenged with fear, resentment, jealousy, or overwhelm, do I let go? Trusting the seasons of life to produce the gift of breathing and dying; or do I cling to the feeling of loss, in hopes that the memory of pain will remind me that I am still alive?
When the storms do come, the old branches are prone to break, and often cause quite a bit of damage to the surrounding property. What about the storms of life? There are natural seasons to opportunity, harvesting, and resting. Burdening a heart with resentment, fear, or worry of lack only brings about damage when the real challenges come.
Think about it, if there are lots of leaves remaining on the trees for the first snow storm, what happens? Those leaves cause the branches to break under the weight of the snow, destroying power lines, and homes in the process. In the cold days of winter, God’s great plan gave the earth a way to shed the unnecessary to strengthen what is required. In times of rest, God too allows us the opportunity to let go of pain, trauma and fear so that we can nurture what is alive and well, all so that we may harvest bountifully the following season.
Letting go can be hard.
- In my own life taking a moment to recognize and to become aware of old thought patterns can be the simple solution to dropping a leaf of worry, or regret.
- Breathing through a rising emotional temperature at the onslaught of imperfection and disappointment, can help me release the effects of my mistakes.
- Apologizing to those I love can rekindle humility and connection, letting them know that they are more important than the defense of my own pride.
- Celebrating tasks accomplished, rather than dismaying a never ending to do list, opens my eyes for gratitude of my personal season with small children and lots of chaos.
- Some leaves that need to be let go include generational thought patterns and habits. I wasn’t even alive when those leaves were grown, I didn’t witness the death of those branches, and yet in resolve I have held tightly to the dried out leaf of abandonment and loss. Letting go has required faith, awareness, good friends, and the power of God’s mercy.
This past year I had an opportunity to write an article about brain injury survivors and their care givers. Salt Lake resident and entrepreneur Laura Nordfelt explained how she learned to let go, after her husband experienced a devastating brain injury, “Looking back at the years filled with the unknown and looking forward to a new realty Nordfelt offers a few nuggets of advise for others who face similar challenges. “Life isn’t going to be what you expected. You have to change your expectations. I have to remind myself everyday. I had to completely change what I thought my life would be, if not, you are setting yourself up to be disappointed for the rest of your life. We live life differently now. And it’s okay.”
Letting go, helps me find gratitude in today. Letting go gives me peace in my offering. Letting go allows me to be present, in this moment, in these challenges, in my opportunities.
